TRANSCRIPT: This is the text of the comic, for purposes such as translation and internet searches.
1.)
(Florence is running from a minotaur, in a dark parking lot.)
2.)
(The chase continues. Florence is wearing elaborate lace stockings and tall shoes.)
FLORENCE: (thinks) Mama, help me! I can’t do this!
3.)
(She offers a prayer to the spirits, clasping her hands together and closing her eyes.)
FLORENCE: P-please! Any of you, help me!
4.)
(The Minotaur is amused that she stopped to pray, and gloats in a weird Antearctan accent.)
OLGA: Heh heh heh! I’m gonna punch ya good, fancy lady!
5.)
(Florence listens to Olga's taunts, looking nervous.)
OLGA: Theo’s my pal, and y’all not been respectin’ him like you oughta! This’ll show ya!
6.)
(Two twinkling blue fairies appear floating at Florence's sides, and gnome-like beings peer from behind her legs.)
OFF SCREEN OLGA: Huh? Gnomes?
7.)
(If they are gnomes, they are grey-skinned, glowing-eyed, blood-dribbling gnomes with tiny daggers in their hands. More emerge.)
8.)
(The minotaur flees and the creepy beings rejoice.)
OLGA: GEHH!! SCARY BABIES!
9.)
(Up close, Florence cries in relief. The blue fairies are wearing cute little outfits and the one resting on her shoulder has a beehive hairdo.)
FLORENCE: Mama...! I did it! I-I can’t believe it!
10.)
(Down at Florence's feet, a creature is already repairing her fancy shoes. It is
wearing sunglasses, a pink fur coat, and tiny replicas of her stockings and shoes.)
FLORENCE: Aww!
11.)
(Darren flees from a creepy vulture monster.)
INTERTITLE: MEANWHILE
DARREN: Fucking fuck fuck shit fucking fuck shit shit!!
12.)
(In disgust and terror and mid-sprint, Darren considers his options.)
DARREN: (thinks) Okay... can’t use the phone but the magic call thing... Ellen? No, she wouldn’t. The old man? Ew...
13.)
(From Darren's thought balloon, cherubic Helen makes a sweetie face, with a heart pendant around her neck. His expression is "UGH.")
IMAGINED HELEN: Daarren I love youu sweeetieee
DARREN: Oh fuck it.
14.)
(Lucricia is interrupted by Helen's astonishment at a psychic missive from the prodigal son.)
DARREN VIBES: Come to me..
LUCRICIA: So I just don't understand why you--
HELEN: My baby!
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