The Kingfisher - Horror webcomic

ABOUT CAST ARCHIVE FORUM BONUS MERCH

REAL ADVENTURES IN ORGAN REMOVAL pt.2 (Transcript and visual captions below)

Buy the ticket, take the mom ride.

ABOUT CAST ARCHIVE FORUM BONUS MERCH

December 19th, 2015

By: Christopher

This story may be slightly exaggerated in some details. The donkey's tattoo there is not one of them.

TRANSCRIPT: This is the text of the comic, for purposes such as translation and internet searches.

1.)

  (A title panel - the whole comic is in the format of a Sunday edition of a daily comic, but in black and white with splashes of orange. We see
   the animal avatars for the U.S. political parties, the donkey of Democrats and the elephant of Republicans. The donkey has text on the side
    spelling out what it represents in the context of this comic, as has been the noble tradition of political comics in American news media for
      maybe too long. The elephant displays distaste for the donkey and what he brings.)

WHITE ACTIONY TEXT: REAL ADVENTURES^TM IN

ORANGE DRIPPY TEXT: ORGAN REMOVAL

SMALLER FANCY TEXT: FEATURING

TEXT ON SIDE OF DONKEY: The Rock Bottom Bare Minimum Health Care a
Murderously Classist Nation Could Get Away With Giving to its Most Vulnerable Citizens Act

SPEECH OF ELEPHANT: Ew, no! Thanks, Obama!

2.)

(Kelly continues to lay about in agony as Chronic Pain perches atop his torso
driving swords in. Christopher is looking more cheerful as he uses a laptop nearby.)

CHRISTOPHER: Well, you're officially five times the length of an abnormally
long gall attack. Time to use that "Affordable Health Care Act" sauce...

KELLY: Just urgent care. I don't want none of that emergency room guff.

CHRISTOPHER: Whatever, iron dogg.

PAIN: Grrr

CHRISTOPHER: So... The closest place that takes it is...

3.)

(Scene change. Kelly and Chris walk through the gravel parking lot of a small medical clinic, Chris
cheerful and Kelly slightly doubled over. In the background, there is a large truck with a confederate
flag on the door and some kinda pipes sticking out the back. The building flies an American flag.)

INTERTITLE: HOUR LONG MOM RIDE LATER ...

CHRISTOPHER: This place don't look too bad.

KELLY: Why all the monster trucks out here?

CHRISTOPHER: To keep them babies bouncin'.

BUILDING SIGN: The St. Jeezis Clinic for Coughing Infants

4.)

(Scene change. Inside, Kelly and Pain receive news from a jolly nurse. Pain likes it, Kelly does not. He's sweating and dark-eyed.)

NURSE: Welp, I reckon yer gonna need one o' them there actural horspitals ...

5.)

(Scene change! Kelly and Chris walk through a lot to a larger building.)

INTERTITLE: ANOTHER 1/2 HOUR MOM RIDE ...

CHRISTOPHER: This looks like a hot ticket.